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I remember back in my undergraduate days when a roommate of mine lost a wristwatch. At first, he was upset but calm. Then, when it became clear that the watch was permanently gone, he began laying heavy curses on whoever had stolen it. I had no problem with him venting his anger until he crossed the line and declared that the thief would die.
That irked me. When I confronted him, he insinuated that maybe I was guilty myself—otherwise, why should I care? That was hilarious to me. In my head I thought, If I were to steal a watch, would it be your unattractive, low-grade one when there were better designer watches all around?
Still, his reaction revealed something deeper. While I sympathized with his loss, I had serious issues with his value system. What on earth could a wristwatch be worth compared to a human life? A thousand wristwatches cannot equal the value of a single soul—including the life of the thief himself. Humans make wristwatches, but who among us can give life?
The truth is, anyone who cannot place the value of human life above material possessions is dangerous. Such a person will make a terrible leader because a man’s priorities always reveal his person.
And that leads me to the second problem I had with my ex-roommate: he didn’t have his wristwatch; his wristwatch had him. It owned him so much that he placed it above the sanctity of life. That mindset—wanting something back at all costs—is frightening. People like that can be brutally cruel and destructive when in positions of power. If you value things more than people, you should never be trusted with leadership.
Leadership is First About the Heart
Two things define a leader: his heart and his skills.
The heart reflects passion, values, and character.
The skills represent technical ability and influence.
While skills are important, how successful a leader becomes depends far more on the kind of heart he has. A skilled person with the wrong heart is dangerous. Skill without the right priorities produces dictators, not leaders.
True leadership is rooted in compassion and service to humanity. It is never about material gain or personal glory. A heart that destroys others to accomplish its own ambition is unfit for power.
One universal truth about leadership is that a true leader C.A.R.E.S.
The C.A.R.E.S. Model of Leadership
C – Collaborative
A true leader understands the power of teamwork. He craves partnerships, makes trade-offs when necessary, and values inclusiveness. Collaboration allows him to achieve far more than going solo, especially in diverse workplaces.
A – Allegiance to Purpose
A leader’s loyalty is to the vision, not to personal interest or public opinion. He makes tough decisions to protect the mission, even when unpopular. Because of this, he is willing to take risks others shy away from in order to move the vision forward.
R – Respectful
A leader genuinely values his people. He respects dissenting voices, admits he doesn’t know it all, and gives credit where it’s due. He listens, learns, and even publicly admits mistakes when necessary. This openness strengthens trust and team cooperation.
E – Empathetic
A true leader listens and seeks to understand others. He steps into their shoes to see from their perspective. He values people above profit and tolerates weaknesses without ignoring legitimate concerns. His empathy deepens loyalty and earns lasting respect.
S – Service-Oriented
Leadership is not about being served but about serving. A true leader makes sacrifices for the success of his people. He places group interests above personal gain and believes his own success lies in helping others succeed. This service-driven culture spreads across organizations, making them more relevant and resilient in the marketplace.
Finally, if you focus only on developing skills but neglect to shape the heart, you will raise monsters in executive suits—brilliant today, destructive tomorrow. Organizations must prioritize both technical competence and the cultivation of the right heart.
At the end of the day, the heart is the foundation of lasting success. Without the five qualities of C.A.R.E.S., you may have authority, but you are not a leader. With them, your leadership impact will grow naturally and sustainably.
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